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Composer's
Notes for Mater in Memoriam
Mater
in Memoriam: For Irene, Chamber Ensemble version, is scored
for Flute, Oboe, Timpani, Vibraphone, Violin, Viola, Cello,
Piano, and SSAA, and has eight movements. The performance
time is approximately 40-45 minutes.
Optional
dance and/or computer graphics can
also be incorporated as a multi media media presentation.
The
Piano version has seven movements (a dance movement is omitted),
and lasts 35-40 minutes.
The
optional computer graphics also are available with the Piano
version. The graphics may be viewed here.
Mater
in Memoriam: For Irene was originally written with the
help of a grant from the Thanks Be to Grandmother Foundation,
and now with a grant
from the City of Ventura Cultural Affairs Division. Part of
the stipulation of the original grant is that the work must
be of benefit to women.
I
especially owe gratitude to my longtime friend, confidante
and collaborator, local poet Sue Carroll Moore, who over the
years has always encouraged me to pursue my music, and whose
beautiful ways with
words have made it easy to set her lyrics. And, to my dear
partner Mary, who gave me words of praise in darkest hours,
and listened and heard the transformations in this work over
the last couple of years, and even supplied ideas for several
lines of one poem. Her graphics are a wonderful addition to
this event, giving it depth and visual magic.
The
Ventura Grant has as its focus community involvement. This
multi-media performance is one of a kind, and meets my longing
to return music to its ancient origins as a partner with poetry
and dance, a
Gesamtkunstwerk in which music and word collaborate with movement
to complete the message. All the performers are from this
area, and all play an equal role in its success.
And,
of course, my gratitude with writing this work goes to my
mother Irene, who recognized my musical talent early on and
encouraged me to fulfill my soul's purpose of creating and
performing music, at a time when few women were visible as
composers.
In
thinking how I would approach MIMI (as I affectionately call
it), several things were absolutely clear. First, MIMI had
to explore my relationship to my mother. To my knowledge,
there is only one requiem
written specifically for women's voices, and none written
for a composer's mother.
To
give MIMI a more universal appeal, I decided to include my
mother's name in the title only. I want listeners to identify
with my feelings of ambivalent loss, and extend it to the
loss of any female loved one in their life. We can lose childhood
friends by moving, high school pals by going to different
colleges or workplaces, we can separate through career or
marriage, or go through breakups with a friend or lover. Each
listener can supply her/his own name and circumstance.
I
use female voices to express this most intimate of relationships
-
starting out as we all do, in the womb of another female.
A female voice
explores the various moods and emotions of this special relationship,
extending through the entire life cycle from birth to death.
I don't
exclude the male listener, but rather emphasize a female-female
dynamic
which has been historically neglected in literature, music
or the visual
arts.
Rather
than write in the traditional Latin Requiem Mass format I
decided
to use my own words together with the fine poetry and poetic
sense of
Sue Carroll Moore, my gifted collaborator. One poem, Glimmering
Girl, is
entirely Sue's work, which I honor as the penultimate piece
in the work.
MIMI
has several unifying themes which characterize my relationship
to
my mother. Like any mother-daughter relationship, it had its
ups and
downs. These emotional cycles are expressed in Irene's favorite
themes
and melodies, five of which are fond in almost all of the
pieces.
1.O
Sacred Head Now Wounded, a German Lutheran Chorale set in
the
Renaissance and used often by Bach in various settings, notably
the St.
Matthew Passion and the Christmas Oratorio. I chose this hymn
to be
played at my Mother's memorial service in 1993. The very first
six notes
of the Oboe Introduction of the Requiem are in fact from this
Chorale.
2.
Danny Boy, a tune my mother loved. This Scottish folk song
was played
at her memorial service in a setting I arranged.
3.
Joseph Dearest Joseph Mine, a German Christmas Carol from
the Middle
Ages which my mother especially liked and I have sung many
times over
the years.
4.
Abends wenn ich schlafen geh' (Evenings When I Go to Sleep)
from
Humperdinck's opera Hansel and Gretel. Sung at the point when
H&G are
lost in the forest and 14 Angels come to their assistance
and
protection. It was an opera both my mother and I could relate
to, and a
prayer we both liked as well.
5.
The bell tower chimes at Indiana University, whose chimes
I heard
daily for 17 years, and whose weekly Saturday Evening Carillon
Concerts
influenced me more than I ever knew.
Other
melodies are directly quoted: from Marriage of Figaro by Mozart
(in Glimmering Girl), Carmen's' Dance from the opera of the
same name, a
portion of Wake Awake for Night is Flying, another German
Lutheran
Chorale used in Bach's Cantata 140 which I sang with my mother
directing. Finally, the Irish Reel is of my own invention,
bit is
similar to the ones Irene loved to hear through her life.
And
now I turn to the work itself:
Lament
Set for a soulful melancholy Oboe, an instrument my mother
favored, this lament expresses at once sadness, virtuosity,
exuberance, and determination. The musical ups and down parallel
the meandering vicissitudes of life. The Oboe line breaks
rules, stretches boundaries, but comes back down to the simple
sound of Danny Boy and its doleful call to Danny to leave
the Highlands, go to battle, and ultimate death. A sobering
contemporary theme.
Mama
Records the birth process -- the Timpani maintains a constant
heartbeat and solace for the terrified unborn, waiting and
yet resisting to be born A cry of exuberance marks the entrance
of the child into the world forcefully, but triumphantly.
Thank
You
My mother spoke of a tradition in her family -- you would
give your mother a present on your own birthday, a thank you
for being borne. This is my thank you for the gift of birth,
in spite of all the tumbles and falls, and most especially
for the gift of song.
The
Girl I Couldn't Be
This bold and defiant piece expresses my rebellious feelings
in ways I never allowed myself while my mother was living.
Every mother has an idea of what her child is to be. Music
was our common bond -- and paradoxically our source of greatest
tension, because of our conflicting self expectations. What
better way to express this conflict than in music? Music sets
both of us free. The next thing to do is to dance for joy!
Irish
Reel (Dance)
Irish dance music was a favorite of Irene's, growing up as
she did amongst the Irish in St. Paul MN. If you listen closely,
you will hear Joseph Dearest, Joseph Mine woven somewhere
in between.
Second
Chance
Don't we all wish we had just another chance to say something
to our mother or departed loved one? This piece explores that
dream -- to see her again, to express my love and receive
her approval. Another chance for a proper exchange. Listen
for the piano as it reflects dreamy and defiant moods.
Glimmering
Girl
As a consummate musician Irene introduced me to the vast world
of classical and sacred music. But we often differed in just
what role this music was to play in our lives. The battle
in GG tells of the mythical and whimsical "land of Myrrh
and land of Glyn" where mother and daughter can perhaps
experience things together on a transformed, magical level.
Sue's
use of the word “opera” was stunningly apt for my relationship
to
Irene. Opera was a major bone of contention between us. Irene
strove to
maintain the Apollonian world of the sacred and ethereal Renaissance
and
Baroque music, while I secretly longed to partake of the Dionysian
world
of opera. The sacred battled the secular.
Symbolically,
each of us longs to “go the opera” with our mothers. This
piece takes us on a whimsical journey to a land like that
of Glyn and
Myrrh, a metaphoric place where differences can be forgotten,
and each
can hold the other's hand, where we can live beyond those
old tensions
and tuggings.
Now
You Go to Gentle Rest
Written originally for All Soul's Day as a recessional for
SA and hand bells, Now You Go is a musical farewell I wasn't
able to offer her at the time of her death. This final piece
portrays a reconciliation of Irene's Christian faith with
my more ecumenical, spiritual orientation. The Dona Tibi Pacem
is a parting nod to Latin Liturgy, concluding with a female
centered ending. The university chimes we both knew accompany
this farewell.
THE POEMS:
Lament
(Oboe Solo)
Mama
Mama
Thank
You
Thank you for bearing me,
For daring me
For daring me to be
No matter what the price
Or sacrifice.
You
let me run and fall
Thank you for my tumbles
But most especially,
Thank you for light and life,
For laughter, love and song
You knew it all along
They were your greatest gifts of all.
The
Girl I Couldn't Be
You wanted so for me to be
The girl I couldn't be.
I wanted you to understand
I wanted you to take my hand.
I'm
not the girl you thought you bore
Can play that game no more
I'll be the girl I'm meant to be
I'll sing and set me free.
Second
Chance
Last night I saw you in my dreams,
You came to say good-bye.
We never had that final word -
I always wondered why.
If
I could see you one more time,
What would I say to you?
Would I tell you now the things
Which then I couldn't do?
Could
this second chance with you
Ease the pain inside?
What would I want to tell
What would I try to hide?
Could I forgive you finally,
and you forgive me too?
Knowing that this might well be
My one last chance with you.
Last
night I saw you in my dreams,
You came to say good-bye.
You said the words I longed to hear.
“I love you just the way you are,
My sweetest daughter, dear.”
Glimmering
Girl
And maybe I shall go with you, my glimmering girl
To the land of Glyn, to the land of Myrrh
Where cats wear gleaming fine faces and purple fur
And the daisies bend down singing lowly: murr, murr
And
maybe we shall go there together my girl
Decked out in moth's wings and juniper fur
To the opera in the land of Myrrh
[Evenings when I go to sleep
fourteen Angels round me keep,
Two to my right, two to my . . .]
The one beyond reckon beyond call and ken
That harks back when.
And
maybe we shall go there my glimmering girl
In summertime, in bumblebee time
And
maybe we shall go there, my glimmering, glimmering, girl
Now
You Go to Gentle Rest
Now you go to gentle rest,
Here no more an earthly guest.
And as I sing my heart's farewell,
I'll let the bells their comfort tell.
In
aeternam, dona tibi pacem
There
is a place within my heart,
Where you and I will never part.
A place I'm keeping just for you,
Where those who love us visit, too.
In
aeternam . . .
So
let the bells their comfort tell.
For you will ever in me dwell.
I'll bless you now although you're gone,
And leave you with this tender song.
Pacem,
dona nobis pacem
In
aeternam, Mother blessed be.
Naomi Stephan
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